Gehirun Helpline 1

From today onwards, I decided to dish out advice regularly to all other people with big problems.

This blog is a brainy blog and I am so brainy, it would be such a sin not to share my intelligence

If you all got any problems that need my help, you can ask me privately. All identities will be kept a secret.

Today the first person I want to help is England's football manager Steve McClaren. So my topic would be

HOW TO SOLVE THE LAMPARD-GERRARD CONNUMDRUM (insert cheesy music)

Now one of the biggest problems Steve McClaren has is to solve this problem properly. Well, LAMPARD and Gerrard are very similar players with similar strengths and similar styles. But there is no point deploying two such players into midfield.....

So how to solve this problem. Whoever can will lead England to win what they want to win....

1) Quit being England Manager. Must be very capable to deal not just with players but media and WAGs (Wives and Girlfriends) Must win power struggle with powerful players and so many mah-fan things to do.... Quit lah. Luiz Felip Scholari can do it. Not you

2) Play 4-4-2. Gerrard on the right, since Benitez plays him on the right midfield in Liverpool. Play Joe Cole on the left. Owen Hargreaves as holding midfielder and LAMPARD can marshall the midfield.... Aaron Lenning can be substitute. Carrick defender at the back. Beanpole Crouch and Rooney at the front.

Perfect! Maybe I should be the manager. Haha

3) Learn from Singapore. Get Ronaldinho to be English citizen. Then proceed to remove LAMPARD or Gerrard.

4) Break one leg of either LAMPARD or Gerrard. Then you only got one choice at a time.

Teacher got say you must listen, is that clear?

One interesting observation. If one Singaporean bookie be England manager, then LAMPARD will keep thinking the manager keep calling him....

But actually not..... WAHAHAHA! Get it?

Haha