Kiantong's Story

Today I got a story to tell.

This is not some bo liao blog posting. So please read patiently.

A few days ago I met my friend in australia on the msn.....

Then we talked for awhile..... And suddenly I just told him something that nobody knew for a few months.....

I also dont know why I did it........ But sometimes you tell your deepest secrets to those who are the furthest away, physically or emotionally........

I expected a very harsh dressing down from him but it didnt come.......

All he said was: 'Yeah? Continue....'

And then I started to tell him everything that happened...... the past few months........ since performance ended till now..... slowly bit by bit I said more and more......

At the end of it....... he still didnt scold me.....

He just said three sentences:

'Well, I am not going to judge you'

'But you of all people should know that it is no good'

'So just make sure you know what you are doing and will be doing'

And I just lost control of myself and started to sob....

Loudly.......

Uncontrollably.........

I cried so hard that I wasnt even sure what was going on already.

The only other time I cried so hard was when zhen shang gong left wise words for her proteges before she died.....

In this world and day when everyone is so well educated and opinionated, it is hard to find someone who doesnt judge people on some of their actions.....

And listen.....

I think I just felt grateful...........

So dear friends, if you know what is going on, please dont pour advice, no matter how well meaning it is.....

I made advice giving my profession remember? so I know just as well as you do.........

Sometimes when you are defeated you just cant help it.... Its an alternative to suicide, really.

I just need time.... A lot of it.........

Thanks Ravind....... Now I remember why we bothered talking during those hard times in the Army.....

Thank you. Really